i was up and you pushed me down.

i'm ashamed of my dreams.

of plans that don't fit in yours.

who knows art anyways. i could do it. really i could.

how words can just completely be ingrained into your mind. repeating itself over and over and over again. i haven't stopped thinking about it yet.

my latest nightmares if i haven't already mentioned them: my body open and everyone taking my organs like they were candy, little kids, businessmen, family.
second: being repeatedly sexually assualted by a man who i couldn't get away from.

perhaps it is all just stress.