the city slumbers

the city isn't big but it sure is lonely when you're out there by yourself. i guess things will change by tomorrow, because if they don't i'm not going to stay here long.
my apartment is the kind of apartment you would imagine a starving artist living in. so i guess we mesh, the apartment and i. i tried to make it nice, with the stained antique chair that also happens to be broken. 780 dollars worth of supplies lying all over my floor. i have no where to put it. along with my sanity.
perhaps i really am insane.
i havent had the internet for a good week. found the library. it's quiet here. it's quiet in my apartment. the city is a quiet one.
i can't go out at night, because there are hobos in the park which is only a few buildings down. people get jumped i'm told. and a young girl like myself shouldn't go anywhere by myself.
i am going to make myself potatos tonight. a comfort food that is always appreciated. says my stomach.


here it is again. nothing to blog about except food and a couple oddities that spring from the mind.

i told someone a few days ago that i had no imagination. i cried later repeating the words," I do have an imagination."
i was just trying to convince myself.

instead of going out on a friday night i stained, painted, and cleaned my furniture for the new apartment.

i'm obsessed with my new old vintage chair, ripped the old stain off, cleaned off the gooey grime and stained the beautiful wood arms. looks good. now i have to clean the pads.

i also have a huge lamp that stands about 4 ft. looking like it was from the 30's. brass round bottom. gorgeous.

and painting ugly old dressers. oh well i am excited.


this is my life

i hate going through the motions. every morning is a routine.

my car died, which throws a wrench in the usual. i got an apartment for super cheap close to my college. do polaroids have black and white film? they probably do.

i'm starting to freak out. this whole new situation equates to some harsh anxiety.

i got my tattoo. no pictures quite yet. sorry dear lee.

someone asked me at our vegetarian barbeque if i was an only child. i told them "no but I am the only sane one" which is a lie. i've come to the realization that i am as wacko as the next, i just may be able to hide it better.

i will finally live on my own. no one else. just the city and i.

i'm off to hide in the real world, doing real worldly things, such as working and fixing my car.